I RESOLVE..........

• That I will grieve as much and for as long as I feel like grieving, and that I will not let 
  others put a time table on my grief.

• That I will grieve in whatever way I feel like grieving, and I will ignore those who try to tell 
  me what I should or shouldn’t be feeling and how I should or shouldn’t be behaving.

• That I will cry when ever and where ever I feel like crying, and I will not hold back my tears just 
  because someone else feels I should be "brave" or "getting better” or "healing by now".

• That I will talk about my child as often as I want to, and I will not let others turn me off just 
  because they can't deal with their own feelings.

• That I will not expect family and friends to know how I feel, understanding one who has not lost a 
  child cannot possibly know how it feels.

• That I will not blame myself for my child’s death, and I will constantly remind myself that I did 
  the best job of parenting I could have possibly have done. But when feelings of guilt are overwhelming, 
  I will remind myself that this is a normal part of the grief process and it will pass.

• That I will not be afraid or ashamed to seek professional help if I feel it is necessary.

• That I will commune with my child at least once a day in whatever way feels comfortable and natural 
  to me, and that I won't feel compelled to explain this communion to others or to even justify or even 
  discuss it with them.

• That I will try to eat, sleep, and exercise every day in order to give my body strength it will 
  need to help me cope with my grief.

• To know that I am not losing my mind and I will remember myself that loss of memory, feelings of 
  disorientation, lack of energy, and a sense of vulnerability are all normal parts of the grief process.

• To know that I will heal, even though it will take a long time.

• To let myself heal and not to feel guilty about feeling better.

• To remind myself that the grief process is circuitous- that is, I may not make steady upward progress. 
  And when I find myself slipping back into the old moods of despair and depression, I will tell myself 
  that slipping backward is also a normal part of the grief process and these moods too will pass.

• To try to be happy about something for some part of everyday, knowing that at first, I may have to 
  force myself to think cheerful thoughts so eventually they can become a habit.

• That I will reach out at times and try to help someone else, knowing that helping others will help me 
  to get over my depression.

• That even though my child is dead, I will opt for life, knowing that is what my child would want me to do.